Halo Reach

Oh Bungie, why must you do this to me? You know I'm trying so hard to hate you but then you give me Halo games and I can't stay mad at you. Ok I'll admit it, Halo Reach was pretty fucking awesome even if at some points it did feel like already walked ground, some of the new toys made sure it never felt boring.

Okay so if you've played ANY Halo game you already know the story. The Covenant is back and they're doing something bad and you have to stop them (luckily the flood is nowhere to be seen;thank the lords). Anyway you are a part of a team of elite Spartans task with infiltrating the thing for the thing to prevent the thing...err to be honest I couldn't follow the story after the first level. I'm not saying its bad or anything its just that it feels kind of repetitive to all the other Halo variations. Go here, deactivate/activate that, make daring escape, kill baddies, repeat. Again not repetitive just kind of straight cut. Your team consists of a Captain, a brave yet hurting guy, a big mouthed toughie, a woman(omg =O!)tech specialist, and yourself aka the new recruit. You'll be visiting various planets and building interiors, again not amazing just kinda eh.

What is there to say about the controls? Again if you've played any Halo game(or any current FPS game) you already know how it works. There is no dual wielding which I was looking forward to but then was reminded it was a prequel to the first Halo then let go. The new additions come in the form of various perks which you can pick up and use right away with a small cooldown after each use. They range from invisibility up to a jet-pack and will provide you with a new way of playing and disposing of alien baddies (Flying above them and throwing grenades is awesome).

I'm not a big fan of the Multiplayer but if it's anything like the previous multiplayers, its a shinning gem among MP idols. That's one thing I can credit the Halo series for : Good Multiplayer action. Of course most of the players are huge asshole pre-teens but that shouldn't be a deciding factor. Reach also doesn't lack Single player to compensate with MP. It balance them out fairly well with the SP story being about 6~8 hours(unlike Halo 3 where the singleplayer was like 3 hours wtf). Regardless Halo Reach is another fantastic game from Bungie surely to make you lose much sleep and keep you entertained for awhile.


Yeah this review is a little short but there's only so much I can say about the game without ruining it. Also, its not very different from like ODST. The game is very safe and never steps over any major lines. Also Im kind of busy playing it again..uhh....yeah....

Bayonetta

When a commercial promises you "Non stop climax action" you can't help but become excited and then the other kind of excited. No its not a Playboy TV commercial, it was a Japanese commercial that ran for the insane game called Bayonetta. Bayonetta is a game made by the creators of Devil May Cry who are know for their extremely over-the-top gameplay and insane story. Bayonetta delivers that and so much more.

Bayonetta is an extremely powerful witch better known in their world as an Umbra witch. Her black body suit is made of her own hair (its comes from her head not that other place)which she uses to summon giant fists and infernal demons to kick some major ass. When she uses her hair attacks, the hair flies off her body and showing off her lady parts (tastefully...sometimes) then form whatever it was you intended to use it for. She also straps guns to her feet which prove extremely fun and useful in combat. She uses lollipops as health and magical boosts and her taunts are so sexual that you might want to play this game at night with all the doors locked in the dark.

If you haven't already guessed, Bayonetta is completely drenched in sexuality. Even when you walk her ass bobs side to side so dramatically its like she has no spine. The sexuality does NOT deter the greatness of this game it adds more to it because she isn't afraid of her own body. Some people might say that she paints females in negative light and makes them all look like whores and sluts but honestly is it wrong to kick major ass and look good doing it? I don't think so. No way. Plus I prefer her ten times over that Tomb raider bitch who kills natives for their treasures because she has a fetish for shiny shit.

The story, well the story for this game is extremely confusing so I suggest not trying to follow it too closely or your brain might shut down. Bayonetta is a witch who hunts down angels to stay out of hell but the angels might be bad and the witches are good because the angels want to resurrect a giant ancient idol that will lead them into greatness but the witches want to stop them because it might destroy the world and then there are these huge angels that shed their skin when you attack them and are all demon looking inside so they might be really bad and then there's a guy with a scarf that says you killed his dad and there's a little girl who might be your daughter or you from the the past and there's a weird creepy voice that keeps telling you not to worry and- ARGGGGGGG I can't do it! Its just too fucking confusing. Look the main things you need to know is : Angels bad, kick they ass.

The controls for Bayonetta are as smooth and responsive as hell. Preforming and chaining attacks is easy as is the dodging. As you fight your witch meter increases which lets you do Torture attacks which range from an iron maiden to a giant tombstone falling from the sky and crushing your opponent. When you dodge a split second before an enemy attack lands you go into Bullet Time(or Witch Time as they call it) in which time slows down and you move significantly faster and are able to string attacks easier. You can alternate between two weapon sets with a click of the RT regardless if you're attacking so swapping guns for a sword or a whip mid battle is easy. The weapons are varied and plentiful; a whip, demon claws, Nun chucks(complete with Bruce Lee style battle cries) and more that you can switch and swap for interesting weapon combinations (weapons on your hands and feet? Yes please!). The way to get weapons is to collect vinyl LPs that you find either by defeating enemies or in the environment and take to a guy name Rodin at the Gates of Hell(nod) and after a few minutes you get brand new weapons. Some of the weapons are pretty hard to get but the replay value for this game is so high you will be coming back just to see if you missed anything. There are also accessories you can by that aid you in battle such as damage reflection, Witch time activation and more to keep you playing Bayonetta for hours.

The difficulty of Bayonetta ranges from simple one button press does everything to murderously hard. One of my main gripes in Bayonetta is the soundtrack. They keep replaying the same three songs over and over and over again everytime you engage a fight. Its a small gripe but when you have to hear the same song over and over it starts grinding on your nerves. Luckily this is quenched by the death of your enemies and Bayonetta's own battle moans. Besides that, Bayonetta's campy storyline, fast paced and filling combat system, and huge selection of enemies ranging from small to planetary sized will keep you coming(ha) back over and over again.

Singularity

Lets see if any of this sounds familiar : Evil Nazi, Mutants, other worldly powers, Mutated Nazis, Ravensoft. No it's not a sequel to that horrible Wolfenstein remake, its Singularity. Singularity is yet another swipe from Ravensoft about how much Nazis suck. I'm not saying Singularity is a lazy re-edit of Wolfenstein with new abilities.....oh wait that's almost exactly what it is.

Singularity tells the story of Captain Nathaniel Renko who is on his way to investigate why an American spy satellite was destroyed so they end up flying to a secret island called Katorga-12 but suddenly another electromagnetic pulse(Think the Citadel explosion after effect in Half Life) downs the helicopter he's in. So far so familiar. Through a series of events you learn that Katorga-12 wasn't meant to be found (Think about Bioshock) which has discovered a secret mineral called ADAM Element 99 which is basically a miracle maker and can do almost anything. Of course people abused it and ended up fucking everything up.

Ok honesty time, I didn't really get to finish Singularity partly because it was so horribly bad I couldn't bare to take it. The controls are probably the only decent thing since it controls like any generic FPS out now. The guns lack any punch, you can empty 2 clips before the most basic monsters go down and upgrading does absolutely NOTHING to help out. The environment is pretty crappy too. Messy, brown and blown up buildings is all you'll see. EVERYTHING is blown up. There isn't any indication to where you are suppose to go either, you can spend hours circling the same 4 rooms until you either get lucky and find the right way or eject the disk and snap it in half (Gamefly wouldn't like that though). Singularity wants you to scavenge and get ammo, health, etc but since everything looks the same you'll end up getting yourself lost. The enemies can take tons of damage and kill you in a few hits which totally throws off that balance thing that's so necessary in games.

There's one thing that I really liked about Singularity and that was the gimmicky Time Manipulation Device which was awesoomeee. I admit having fun aging and renewing items for awhile and there are some parts that leave you going "Holy shit that was amazing!" but after the initial charm is gone they shit on it. They only have you using it to renew stairs and boxes to move along places you need to go. The TMD had so much potential but they didn't really use it. You can use it on enemies and watch them turn to dust or become enraged and attack the enemies attacking you but the thing is, it's not practical when you're in a firefight against tons of soldiers and monsters.

The story of Singularity is so ridiculous you'll get lost from the get go. You are apparently trying to get to the other side of the island but then time cuts back to the past before everything went to hell and you save some guy from a burning building then you need to back in time and save some scientist from dying but then *SPOILERS(?)* I guess he turns out to be the bad guy in the future when you save him in the past and them some other stuff happens (I told you I didn't finish it!) then I guess you kill him, get off the island and the game ends. If you're trying to follow the story, you'll need to play-through it again or just look up the wiki (I recommend the later).

Lastly Singularity doesn't know what genre it wants to be. I know it says Sci-Fi FPS but it tries to copy other mods. It tries the Horror Genre and has you going through a creepy school with ghostly voices and things moving around on their own then it switches to a fast paced FPS gunfight Genre when Nazis descend and start filling you with holes then it goes to Platforming that has you jumping from tiny ledges and well timed places and finally it goes the campy Fallout-esque route with its vintage cartoons explaining Element-99 and its run backwards shooting Super Mutants Mutants hoping you don't run out of hallway.

All and all Singularity is like a game developer raided your game collection of your best games, took pieces of them and tried to make a decent game from their organs and sadly it didn't work. take out the Time Device and Singularity is your average boring shooter that does almost nothing right.

Bioshock

You are the sole survivor of a plane crash in the Atlantic ocean. You surface only to be greeted by walls of flame and a still sinking plane tail. Out in the distance you see a lighthouse and swim desperately to it. You walk up its cold stone steps and step into a world unknown with death and despair from the very first open door. This is how Bioshock envelops you, with its promises of Utopia and freedom of the constrains of man only to twist those freedoms into something darker.

Bioshock is the spiritual successor to System Shock 2 and the similarities are present from your first plasmid. As soon as you step into your first bathysphere you are greeted by a man with a simple idea named Andrew Ryan. He sees the faults in the city above and decided to make one below the waves. Free from moral constraints and morals that usually keep everything civilized but un-imaginative. You will be lead down Rapture's leaking corridors by a man calling himself Atlas which over a radio will guide you through the twisted world of genetic modification to the extreme. As soon as you gain control of your character you are already tense and worried from the previous and bloody beginning cinematic which involves disemboweling and distubing humming.

As you explore Rapture you gain Cybernetic Enhancements Plasmids which will serve as your line of defense and attack ranging from fire, to ice, to a swarm of bees. You start off with a trusty wrench but you also get conventional trigger click weapons like a Tommy Gun, shotgun, pistol which, combined with the plasmids, will serve as the tools to set up ingenious and bizarre ways to dispatch of your enemies which come in the form of splicers. Hybrids Splicers come in a variety of shapes and sizes ranging from the usual, run at you screaming and hit you with a pipe to vanishing throw fireballs at you then vanish types. If that weren't enough there are mini bosses scattered all over the maps which come in the form of Big Daddies. These hulking monstrous things can take loads of damage without even flinching then send you flying across the room. The reason to take these things down are for the little sister which its protecting which comes in the shape of...a little girl...Anyway these little sisters have the highly coveted ADAM which is the main artery to Rapture's success but the only way to get the ADAM is to either kill the little sister for the maximum amount or save her and get not as much but feel good about yourself and that's where the morality choices come in.

The problem with the morality choice is that its way too black and white there's really no in between. You can either be a deity or the devil incarnate which isn't very fair but I guess it comes down to personal preference. There are also Security bots and cameras which Andrew Ryan uses to his favor to spy and/or kill you whenever you get too close to them. Luckily you can hack them which is another major downer because hacking turns into a tedious game of Pipe Dream which is incredibly flow breaking and gets old fast. You can buy out or auto hack them but of course that requires heaps of money which isn't such a big deal but becomes a pain when you go to buy health and ammo and realize you spent all your money hacking 2 turrets.

Another thing that works against Bioshock are the Vita Chambers. These fancy tubes activate when you die; you are instantly re-spawned inside with all your health and any damage you did on any enemies is still there when you revive so you can pretty much die all you want while whittling away the health of a Big Daddy without consequences other than a small loading time between death and re-spawning.

Bioshock is incredibly atmospheric and well crafted and will give you many spooks as you wander around figuring out what happened which is usually told by Audio diaries and ghost sequences scattered around Rapture that tell individual stories while still giving a wide synopsis of the events that lead to the decomposition of Rapture.

The controls are pretty simple and pointing and shooting at what you want dead works perfectly. There are also Tonics which serve to enhance your abilities and you can pretty much become indestructible in a few levels. The story is as twisted as it gets with plenty of twisted characters with gripping and disturbing stories that will keep you reeling, especially when you discover what Atlas is really hiding behind that charming accent and why Andrew Ryan wants him gone.